A Father's Example Can Make ALL the Difference

Luke 15:11-32

¹¹ Jesus continued: “There was a man who had two sons. ¹² The younger one said to his father, ‘Father, give me my share of the estate.’ So he divided his property between them. ¹³ “Not long after that, the younger son got together all he had, set off for a distant country and there squandered his wealth in wild living. ¹⁴ After he had spent everything, there was a severe famine in that whole country, and he began to be in need. ¹⁵ So he went and hired himself out to a citizen of that country, who sent him to his fields to feed pigs. ¹⁶ He longed to fill his stomach with the pods that the pigs were eating, but no one gave him anything. ¹⁷ “When he came to his senses, he said, ‘How many of my father’s hired men have food to spare, and here I am starving to death! ¹⁸ I will set out and go back to my father and say to him: Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. ¹⁹ I am no longer worthy to be called your son; make me like one of your hired men.’ ²⁰ So he got up and went to his father.  “But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him.  ²¹ “The son said to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.’  ²² “But the father said to his servants, ‘Quick! Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet.  ²³ Bring the fattened calf and kill it. Let’s have a feast and celebrate.  ²⁴ For this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’ So they began to celebrate.  ²⁵ “Meanwhile, the older son was in the field. When he came near the house, he heard music and dancing.  ²⁶ So he called one of the servants and asked him what was going on.  ²⁷ ‘Your brother has come,’ he replied, ‘and your father has killed the fattened calf because he has him back safe and sound.’  ²⁸ “The older brother became angry and refused to go in. So his father went out and pleaded with him.  ²⁹ But he answered his father, ‘Look! All these years I’ve been slaving for you and never disobeyed your orders. Yet you never gave me even a young goat so I could celebrate with my friends.  ³⁰ But when this son of yours who has squandered your property with prostitutes comes home, you kill the fattened calf for him!’  ³¹ “ ‘My son,’ the father said, ‘you are always with me, and everything I have is yours.  ³² But we had to celebrate and be glad, because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’ ” 

This was a dad who:

#1 - Set A Good Example For His Sons

This ornery prodigal son even said so himself:

"...‘How many of my father’s hired men have food to spare, and here I am starving to death!'"

Luke 15:17

Think about the facts this father's prodigal son had to consider as he reasoned with himself about returning home:

Dad was a fair man

Dad was a decent man

Dad had a good reputation with others

Can I just tell ya something?  The example a father sets for his child can make ALL the difference in how that child grows up!  And this faith dad from our parable set a great example for his boys.

This was a dad who:

#2 - Had Rules And He Expected Obedience

God expects obedience from us.  Parents who don't EXPECT obedience from their children are simply training their kids to sin.  We don't really know which of dad's rules this prodigal son didn't care for but we do know he didn't want to live under his father's roof any longer.  I'm guessing he didn't want to work AND that he just wanted to do what HE wanted when HE wanted to do it.  I also have to assume that once he hit the road, he surrounded himself with questionable friends.  Note Verse 13:

“Not long after that, the younger son got together all he had, set off for a distant country and there squandered his wealth in wild living." 

Luke 15:13

Notice here that this story, which...just a reminder:  Is a parable JESUS told... does NOT tell us that dad said anything along the lines of:

"Well, gee son, I'm so sorry I offended you with my rules..."

"Hey, let's talk about it buddy..."

"Maybe we can work something out..."

"If you'll just stick around, I'll bend the rules for you..."

"Aww heck son, nevermind the rules...do what you want... just don't leave!"

And, why didn't he say that?  He refused, on principal, to keep his son in his home at the cost of allowing him to have a world-centered personality.  He didn't want a rude, rebellious, and resentful son in his home to corrupt the rest of his family.  Therefore, he refused to give in to the boy's "desires".

Faithful fathers realize something important:  As dads, God holds us accountable and responsible for the influences we allow into our home.  That's our job! 

Can I just tell ya something?  We're not doing our kids any favors why allowing them to do whatever, whenever just to make them happy!  This dad was willing to set up some rules and stand by them.  He expected obedience.  

Then, because this dad put his faith in God, he allowed his son to walk out that door.  This was a man of means with servants and large herds.  He had money.  But we're not told that he hired detectives to track down his son and beg him to come home.  We're not told that he sent his son more money to help him.  We're not told how this dad helped his son avoid the consequences of his rebelliousness. 

Our faithful father here in the parable refused to be an enabler to his son's sinful life choices.  Instead, he waited.  Keeping a watchful eye on the horizon, he waited.  He waited in hopeful and faithful expectation of his son's return.  Sometimes, that's what faithful parenting looks like.

Sometimes, when we don't wait patiently on the Lord, when we don't trust in God, when we refuse to faithfully "be still"...  Well, you know... we can end up doing all kinds of stuff to our relationship with our Creator and to our families that we'll later regret.  The right answer is not always to do nothing.  But, in this case it was.

This entry is taken from my notes for the sermon:  "Faithful Parenting".  Click the link to listen to the entire sermon.  This is the fourth sermon in a series.  The entire sermon series audio is available here:  

BLINDERS, BLINKERS, & WINKERS SERMON SERIES

Faithful Fathers Take Their Job Seriously!

Luke 15:11-32

¹¹ Jesus continued: “There was a man who had two sons. ¹² The younger one said to his father, ‘Father, give me my share of the estate.’ So he divided his property between them. ¹³ “Not long after that, the younger son got together all he had, set off for a distant country and there squandered his wealth in wild living. ¹⁴ After he had spent everything, there was a severe famine in that whole country, and he began to be in need. ¹⁵ So he went and hired himself out to a citizen of that country, who sent him to his fields to feed pigs. ¹⁶ He longed to fill his stomach with the pods that the pigs were eating, but no one gave him anything. ¹⁷ “When he came to his senses, he said, ‘How many of my father’s hired men have food to spare, and here I am starving to death! ¹⁸ I will set out and go back to my father and say to him: Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. ¹⁹ I am no longer worthy to be called your son; make me like one of your hired men.’ ²⁰ So he got up and went to his father.  “But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him.  ²¹ “The son said to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.’  ²² “But the father said to his servants, ‘Quick! Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet.  ²³ Bring the fattened calf and kill it. Let’s have a feast and celebrate.  ²⁴ For this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’ So they began to celebrate.  ²⁵ “Meanwhile, the older son was in the field. When he came near the house, he heard music and dancing.  ²⁶ So he called one of the servants and asked him what was going on.  ²⁷ ‘Your brother has come,’ he replied, ‘and your father has killed the fattened calf because he has him back safe and sound.’  ²⁸ “The older brother became angry and refused to go in. So his father went out and pleaded with him.  ²⁹ But he answered his father, ‘Look! All these years I’ve been slaving for you and never disobeyed your orders. Yet you never gave me even a young goat so I could celebrate with my friends.  ³⁰ But when this son of yours who has squandered your property with prostitutes comes home, you kill the fattened calf for him!’  ³¹ “ ‘My son,’ the father said, ‘you are always with me, and everything I have is yours.  ³² But we had to celebrate and be glad, because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’ ” 

CLEARLY, fathers ARE important to a family.  But, does that mean that a father will ALWAYS do what is right?  Well, that would be nice wouldn't it?  But, of course, we all know that’s not true.  Dads fail.  Dads fall short more often than we would care to admit.

The reality is:  We ALL make mistakes.  We ALL fall short.  Any good dad will also often wonder if his failures have damaged his family in some way.  Been there, done that.

But, here in Luke 15, we have a dad, for the purpose of the parable, who really did do EVERYTHING right.  He did everything right because the dad in the story represents God Himself.  So, he was faultless.  This dad did do it all right.  And yet, his boy still couldn’t stand to be in the same house with him.

This punk of a son was rude, arrogant and self-centered.  He actually, couldn’t wait for dear old dad to die so he could get his hands on His inheritance!  What a precious little darling!

This parable is usually called the parable of: “the lost son” or “the prodigal son”.  That title puts all the focus and emphasis on this ornery rascal of a son.  But, you know, as a dad myself, I see this as much a story about a faithful dad and his methods for dealing with a “lost or prodigal son”.  If it was me, I would name this parable: “The Faithful Father” or “Faithful Parent”.

You see, this is NOT a story about a dad who failed.  It’s a story about a dad who understood his job.  He was "doin’ work" as a dad like it WAS his job.  He protected his home from becoming overwhelmed by this ridiculous unfiltered world we live in.  He protected his home from the same world which had lured his son away and warped his son’s moral compass.  This dad did his best to maintain a God centered home.  

Praise the Lord for dads like this who don't give up.  Praise the Lord for faithful parents who trust in and wait upon the Lord.  Allowing the "prodigal son" to go out on his own and sow his oats was not the end of this story.  This dad did his best to maintain a God-centered home.  Resentment, rebellion, rudeness, and rejection had a temporary hold on his son.  But this faithful father would not allow those things to take over his home or the rest of his family.  The result in the end was that this faithful father ultimately got his son back.

Can I just tell ya something?  This faithful dad was successful because he took his job seriously.  He purposed in his heart to have a God-centered home.

This entry is taken from my notes for the sermon:  "Faithful Parenting".  Click the link to listen to the entire sermon.  This is the fourth sermon in a series.  The entire sermon series audio is available here:  

BLINDERS, BLINKERS, & WINKERS SERMON SERIES

God's Design Is A Team Effort When It Comes To Parenting

Luke 15:11-32

¹¹ Jesus continued: “There was a man who had two sons. ¹² The younger one said to his father, ‘Father, give me my share of the estate.’ So he divided his property between them. ¹³ “Not long after that, the younger son got together all he had, set off for a distant country and there squandered his wealth in wild living. ¹⁴ After he had spent everything, there was a severe famine in that whole country, and he began to be in need. ¹⁵ So he went and hired himself out to a citizen of that country, who sent him to his fields to feed pigs. ¹⁶ He longed to fill his stomach with the pods that the pigs were eating, but no one gave him anything. ¹⁷ “When he came to his senses, he said, ‘How many of my father’s hired men have food to spare, and here I am starving to death! ¹⁸ I will set out and go back to my father and say to him: Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. ¹⁹ I am no longer worthy to be called your son; make me like one of your hired men.’ ²⁰ So he got up and went to his father.  “But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him.  ²¹ “The son said to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.’  ²² “But the father said to his servants, ‘Quick! Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet.  ²³ Bring the fattened calf and kill it. Let’s have a feast and celebrate.  ²⁴ For this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’ So they began to celebrate.  ²⁵ “Meanwhile, the older son was in the field. When he came near the house, he heard music and dancing.  ²⁶ So he called one of the servants and asked him what was going on.  ²⁷ ‘Your brother has come,’ he replied, ‘and your father has killed the fattened calf because he has him back safe and sound.’  ²⁸ “The older brother became angry and refused to go in. So his father went out and pleaded with him.  ²⁹ But he answered his father, ‘Look! All these years I’ve been slaving for you and never disobeyed your orders. Yet you never gave me even a young goat so I could celebrate with my friends.  ³⁰ But when this son of yours who has squandered your property with prostitutes comes home, you kill the fattened calf for him!’  ³¹ “ ‘My son,’ the father said, ‘you are always with me, and everything I have is yours.  ³² But we had to celebrate and be glad, because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’ ” 

Can I just tell ya something?  One thing is for certain, a good father has a significant impact on a family for generations to come!  Professor David Popenoe, in his book, "Life Without Father", said this:  "Depriving children of fathers has become the most prevalent form of child mal-treatment in America today."

Why are fathers so important?

Fathers Protect Their Family

Fathers protect their daughters from abuse.  I'll never forget the day several years ago, I called a young man's mother to advise her I had already asked her son to get lost more than once.  I then informed her I was prepared to contact the sheriff the next time he had any contact with my daughter.  It was necessary to protect her.  We had discovered a letter he had written to our 14 year old daughter laced with inappropriate language of an adult nature.  I ended up calling the sheriff twice!

Fathers protect their wives from assault.  My wife and I were in downtown Kansas City in the Power & Light District for dinner.  After exiting the restaurant and on our way to the van, what appeared to be a drunk and homeless man approached us.  Instinctively, I blocked his path to protect my wife and hustled her inside the van.  The man turned and walked the other direction.

Fathers Are Providers

Even though many mothers work, ultimately, it is the father's responsibility to provide.

Fathers Are Role Models

Fathers are role models for sons AND for daughters.  Daughters learn what to look for in a husband.  Sons learn about male responsibility and achievement.  Sons best learn about suitable assertiveness and independence from their fathers.  A father's authority and discipline in rearing sons, particularly when for boys in their teens, is difficult for a mother to achieve.

Can I just tell ya something?  Mom's can raise their voice.  Sometimes though, dad needs to come charging in like a bull with steam coming his ears and put the hammer down!

Fathers often provide some of that "rough and tumble" play...but within limits.  Kids learn that biting and kicking and other forms of physical violence are not acceptable.  They learn when enough is enough.

A daughter's relationship with dad is critical

When a daughter enjoys her father/daughter relationship, she experiences a healthier femininty.  She feels loved and worthy AND she is able to trust.  Daughters who are able to trust men normally, generally grow up and marry trustworthy men.

Fathers teach survival skills

Fathers teach survival skills of competition.  Kids tend to learn skills in challenge, initiative, risk-taking, and independence from their dads.  Moms tend to be the ones to emphasize social and relationship skills.  Dads, generally speaking, are more long-term development focused.  Moms are more immediate situation focused.

Dads tend to focus more on justice, fairness, and duty based on rules.  Moms tend to focus more on sympathy, care, and helping based on relationships.

BUT, can I just tell ya something?  God's design is for a MOM AND A DAD to actively raise a child TOGETHER!  There certainly is no doubt, God's design is a TEAM EFFORT when it comes to parenting.


This entry is taken from my notes for the sermon:  "Faithful Parenting".  Click the link to listen to the entire sermon.  This is the fourth sermon in a series.  The entire sermon series audio is available here:  

BLINDERS, BLINKERS, & WINKERS SERMON SERIES